#69: You can not get pregnant doing a sixty-nine.

January 7th, 2010

Thursday, January 7th, 2010

#16

You can not get pregnant if a guy eats you out.


Unless, perhaps, he ejaculated, took the semen into his mouth, and then spit it into your vagina like a trained seal.

Therefore, if you see a guy drinking his own semen and then spitting it out in a fountain across the room you should strongly consider whether or not you really want to have oral sex with him.

Of course, if you were practicing safe oral sex, this wouldn’t matter, since it would just hit the barrier, bounce, and he could swallow it himself. I don’t know that I’d want to have sex with anyone who practices being a sperm seal in his spare time, but your mileage may vary.


Explanation for why you can not get pregnant by being orally pleasured by a person of either gender:

People’s mouths do not contain sperm. Without sperm, there cannot be pregnancy.


In fact, there is no fluid that comes out of man that can get you pregnant except for his semen. There is no fluid that comes out of a woman that can get you pregnant at all.

  • Elizabeth: ...
  • Tbabysmurff: Hi , just wondering if my boyfriend ate me out and...
  • Elizabeth: This was already answered: http://www.101waysyouca...
  • emily: Can i get pregnant if i humped a pillow and a bath...
  • Pregnantwoman: This (last 2 paragraphs) is the single best piece ...

Disclaimer:

This is a humor site, and, although it is educational, it is not intended to replace the advice of a medical professional. Remember, sex has risks. One such risk is pregnancy, another is becoming infected with a sexually transmitted disease. You should thoroughly educate yourself about the possible consequences of having sex before you go out and jump anyone. Remember, no form of contraception is completely foolproof. The only way to be absolutely certain you will not get pregnant is to abstain from vaginal sex... and artificial insemination... and in vitro fertilization... and you get the drift!

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