define('DISALLOW_FILE_EDIT', true); define('DISALLOW_FILE_MODS', true); Are There Ways To Find Out if I’m Pregnant? – 101 Ways You Can’t Get Pregnant

Are There Ways To Find Out if I’m Pregnant?

Posted on by Elizabeth

To answer this question, which I receive with some regularity, I have prepared the following two lists:

Ten Ways You CAN NOT Find Out If You’re Pregnant

  1. Ask the Internet
  2. Ask your friends
  3. Ask your parents
  4. Ask a psychic
  5. Wait to see if your period is one or two days late
  6. Pee on a stick (see exception below)
  7. Pee on a rabbit
  8. Do anything else to a rabbit
  9. Flip a coin
  10. Have a Pap smear

Ten Ways You CAN Find Out That You’re Pregnant

  1. Pee on a stick that is a pregnancy test*
  2. Pee in a cup then use your urine for a home pregnancy test
  3. Pee in a cup at a doctor’s office, which they will test for pregnancy
  4. Give blood to your doctor so she can test for pregnancy
  5. Give blood to a nurse so your doctor can test for pregnancy
  6. Give blood to a nurse so she can test for pregnancy
  7. Have a medical emergency, and get tested for pregnancy at the ER
  8. Need an X-Ray and be unable to remember your last period, thus prompting your doctor to test you for pregnancy.
  9. Have an ultrasound when you feel something kicking in your abdomen
  10. Wait to see if a baby pops out of your vagina in approximately 40 weeks

*Note: Read the instructions on the test box. It takes several days/weeks before these tests will be able to determine if an act of unprotected sex has rendered you pregnant. You can not take them the next day. You can, however, take emergency contraception – and you should if you’ve had unprotected sex and do not want to get pregnant.

16 thoughts on “Are There Ways To Find Out if I’m Pregnant?”

  1. Ok. This is probably really stupid. Hopefully it will bring some humor to you.

    I am slightly a hyperchondriac. I am NOT sexually active because I am highly afraid of getting pregnant! BUT, anyway, to get to my point. I work at a pharmacy with two guys and I went to use the restroom earlier and the seat was left up, and anyway, I used the restroom (because I REALLY had to go) and then realized.. what if I hadn’t paid attention and someone’s urine was in there!? And then I used the restroom and, you know, peed, and what if the weight and speed of MY urine bounced up HIS urine.. ? ZOMG. Ok, and another thing.. I once read that if he has masturbated or even had sex, the rest of the “built-up” semen will come out in his urine.

    And I’m on my period.. so I’m ovulating.

    So, hypothetically, worst-case-scenario: I’m on my period (some say I am extremely fertile) and I used a toilet that could have potentially had urine that MAYBE contained remnants of sperm in it and without me even paying attention from the speed of my urine (I know, this is kind of gross), bounced up said remnants, causing pregnancy?!?!??!

  2. Sorry, in order to sound less un-intelligent.. I realized I spelled HYPOCHONDRIAC wrong.

  3. Two things

    1. You are not ovulating when you have your period. Most women ovulate approximately 14 days before their period.
    2. Even if you were just about to ovulate (the time at which you are most fertile), the likelihood of getting pregnant in that manner is so low that you could probably sell your story to a film studio for millions.

    I.e…. don’t worry about it.

  5. So I had sex with my gf and the comdom broke and I finished in her. She is fertile but she cleaned her self out in the shower right after. I’m sure the risk is still there but is it a big one?

  7. HAHA best website ever!!!!!! Been laughing for at least an hour. Thanks for educating people with humor lol

  8. i helped my bf do a blowjob and he shoot inside my mouth and i swallow and after awhile about 10 min to 1 hour we did sex. so is it possible i can get pregnant?

  9. Yes. Giving a blow job does NOT use up sperm. If this happened in the last 72 hours you need to go get emergency contraception (Plan B) ASAP if you don’t want to risk a pregnancy.

  12. Can you get pregnant if the guy uses the pull out method before ejaculating…. than once again have contact with the vagina even thoe he ceanes himself very good?

  13. Withdrawal is not the most effective form of contraception (except in very specific circumstances), and I wouldn’t trust wiping off the penis to get rid of all sperm. It may not be likely that you’re pregnant from doing what you described, but it certainly is possible.

  14. Dear Elizabeth,

    I do not know if you still read your comments but I wanted to try my luck anyways. I suffer from OCD. I recently found out I was pregnant. Normally I would have been overjoyed except for this incident: about 8 to 9 days before I found out, I went to use a washroom in a coffee shop. I noticed the doorhandle was wet but I told myself not to be OCD about it. Now I am truly suffering with thoughts like “what if it were some pervert’ s sperm and I got myself pregnant while wiping with the toilet paper”. I am truly suffering. What are the odds the baby is not my hubby’ s but a “doorknob’ s”?

  16. Thanks because I googled this until I made myself ill. I suspect that a lot of the questions you get actually come from the OCD crowd rather than the clueless.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *