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101 Ways You Can’t Get Pregnant

And One Or Two Ways You Actually Can

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#19

Posted on June 18, 2010June 18, 2010 by Elizabeth

If you give someone a blow job, make out with him, and then he goes down on you… it will not make you pregnant.

—

I suppose that if you held the semen in your mouth, passed it to his mouth, and then he tried to spit it up into you like a whale shooting water from its blowhole, there might be some chance, but…. you’d really have to work at it.

—


Explanation for why you can not get pregnant from a chain of oral exchange:

If a guy comes in your mouth, which has its own risks, you will most likely swallow the semen or spit it out. Then, when you kiss him, most of it will be gone already. When he goes down on you, he will have presumably swallowed at least once. There’s not going to be living sperm in his mouth to get inside of you. Even if you passed your semen to his mouth and he swallowed it you’d be fine.

17 thoughts on “#19”

  1. Sugarfoot says:
    June 22, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    I just wanted to say…that i love your sense of humor!
    I thought this would be a random list of stupid things…but it is very very good and funny. 😀

    Hope there will be more. (:

  2. Elizabeth says:
    June 22, 2010 at 3:37 pm

    Thanks for the compliment! I wanted to deal with a serious issue in a fun way, because, as you can see from the comments, there are a lot of young people who are really concerned about these questions.

    There will be more Ways, at least 101, but I’m bad at updating the site regularly since I maintain several other blogs and it tends to fall by the wayside!

  3. questionableme says:
    June 24, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    If your are having sex with a guy (unprotected) and he pulls out before he ejaculates onto my stomach, If he insert his cum inside of me after it’s already been ejaculated onto my stomach and not inside of me, can I get pregnant?

  4. Elizabeth says:
    June 24, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    You can potentially get pregnant from the first part (because of pre-ejaculatory semen.) You can definitely get pregnant from the second part. Many people INTENTIONALLY get pregnant with donated semen that was ejaculated outside of the body.

  5. rht_at says:
    June 28, 2010 at 5:47 am

    I had a really heated session with my girl friend.We had oral sex,mutual masturbation, then I rubbed my penis over her vagina WITHOUT entering it (for a long time) without ejaculating over/into her vagina.I even removed pre semen by a towel from time to time and also kept on cleaning her vagina from that fluid , but now she is real tensed and she thinks she can get pregnant.We can not opt for any test also.
    Can she get pregnant or we have to wait for her periods to come to check that which is 3 weeks away.Please help..
    Thanks

  6. RS says:
    July 3, 2010 at 10:56 am

    Hello Elizabeth,
    I’ve gone through this site and it made me laugh. Great sense of humour. I do have a question. I am bit calm after reading your site, but wanted to know your opinion. I was making out with my bf and got a little bit of pre-cum on my palm. We were fully clothed at all times. Soon it became dry (no visible wetness) and I forgot about it. My bf then fingered me. Just touched the vagina (no insertion) for few seconds and the rubbed the clit (less than a minute). His fingers were dry to my knowledge but is it possible to get pregnant if his fingers had touched my hand (which had the dry pre-cum) before fingering?

    Also around 10 min after this, I went to the loo to pee and wiped myself with the tissue with the same hand that had the precum. I would not have touched myself directly, only through the tissue. I don’t remember washing my hands. Could this cause pregnancy? Its a question only on pre-cum, there was no ejaculation.

    Some sites and message boards are very scary. They say just one sperm is enough to cause pregnancy.

    Thanks.

  7. Joey says:
    July 4, 2010 at 4:18 pm

    How long can sperm survive in the mouth?

  8. Elizabeth says:
    July 11, 2010 at 7:59 pm

    The odds of your being pregnant from that are astronomically low.

  9. Elizabeth says:
    July 11, 2010 at 8:02 pm

    This is actually an excellent question, but it requires some research. When I have a chance, I will do that research and get back to you. I will say that it is extremely unlikely for sperm that has been in someone’s mouth to end up somewhere that it could get someone pregnant.

  10. brianna says:
    August 27, 2010 at 2:20 pm

    Hi
    i was just wondering if a guy ejaculates in your mouth , and than you hold it in your mouth and transfer it to your vagina could there be a chance you could get pregnant ?? i’m just wondering because a friend asked me and i dont know what to tell her ??

  11. caitlin says:
    December 11, 2010 at 9:09 pm

    Hey I had sex almost a week ago with my partner and he pre- cumed and blew inside me and pulled out like 30 seconds after he blew is there a possiblitie I could get pregnant and how big of a chance? I also don’t ever have my period so I can’t goo by that

  12. Sophie says:
    April 3, 2011 at 3:41 am

    Hi, I was just really concerned about a few things.
    Me and my boyfriend were ‘playing around’ on the 18th of March.
    He claims that he washed his hands every time he fingered me, and i also remember myself telling him to go wash his hands before he tried fingering.

    However the part that i’m worried about is, what if he had sperms on his lips and on his tongue (inside his mouth in general) after me kissing him after giving him a blowjob?
    I spat out the semen before kissing him – if i ever did kiss him that night after giving him a blowjob.

    I’m so worried whether these things could get me pregnant.
    I actually did a pregnancy test yesterday, which was 13-14 days after we were playing around, but it came out with a negative.
    But I’m still worried heaps. Could you please help me?
    ANYONE?? 🙁

  13. harry says:
    April 26, 2011 at 8:58 am

    i had sex wit my gf and she did blowjob and swallowed my sperm completely and she didn’t get periods yet . 5 days delayed still she didn’t get periods . is she pregnant? help me 🙁 🙁

  14. Helen says:
    April 26, 2011 at 8:38 pm

    i love your website 🙂
    I was really worried about this issue and i was getting extremely paranoid about it for a good 4 days. thanks so much!

  15. MDH says:
    May 4, 2011 at 6:55 pm

    Me and my boyfriend want to have sex. but i am afraid i might get pregnant and im way to young.weve been dating for a year now and were ready. my sister and her boyfriend are in a sexual relationship and love eachother very much. they only use condoms and im paranoid she’ll get pregnant. i am in eighth grade. my mom isnt around so its my dad. and we will not ask for bc. thats just awkward. what should we do?

  16. dana son says:
    June 20, 2011 at 11:21 am

    can i get pregnant if i swallow other peoples siliva

  17. Elizabeth says:
    June 20, 2011 at 12:09 pm

    Answered here. Thanks for inspiring the post!

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Disclaimer

This is a humor site, and, although it is educational, it is not intended to replace the advice of a medical professional. Remember, sex has risks. One such risk is pregnancy, another is becoming infected with a sexually transmitted disease. You should thoroughly educate yourself about the possible consequences of having sex before you go out and jump anyone. Remember, no form of contraception is completely foolproof. The only way to be absolutely certain you will not get pregnant is to abstain from vaginal sex... and artificial insemination... and in vitro fertilization... and you get the drift!

I Am Not A Pregnancy Test

Therefore, I will no longer be answering personal "am I pregnant?" questions on this site.

If you post your questions, I may still use them as a resource for posts, but this was always intended as a humor and educational site and not an advice site, so I will no longer be offering personal reassurance.

That having been said, one last piece of advice: If you think you might be pregnant, the best way to find out is to wait until you miss your period and take a pregnancy test.

Alternatively, if you've had vaginal intercourse without contraception in the past 72 hours, you can explore emergency contraception to try and interrupt the possibility of pregnancy. However, if you haven't had vaginal intercourse, you are unlikely to be pregnant. It's not completely impossible, but it's extremely unlikely.

Before you start having sex, or thinking about having sex, I highly recommend reading a copy of "our bodies, ourselves" or a similar book about your body so that you understand how sex and pregnancy work, and all the possible risks. If you don't know how sex can affect your body, you shouldn't be fooling around with it. Tell your boyfriends and your mothers that too

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